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Dec 28 '08

12:35:23 PM

Christmas Parades and Cokeheads

Another year of judging the local Christmas Parade brought its joys and chuckles. Each year, for a couple of hours, we - the judges - are the hit of the party. Float contestants watch our every move, ordering kids into alignment and reminding them to wave and smile as we walk by.

"Holiday movies" was this year's theme, which was certainly more flexible than in the past. Of course, some didn't have a clue, so they just showed up with a manger scene. Sorry, but we have to judge on theme and not whether we'll be struck by lightning if we give entrants big fat zeros for their mangers. Other entrants were a little confused between what constitutes a movie and a TV show. Oh, well.

The popular floats this year were "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" and "The Polar Express." Two in particular stood out, so early on we pretty much acknowledged there'd have to be a tie-breaker. As we approached the best of the Grinch floats, children of all ages mingled about, as if they were really in Whoville. Indeed, their Who hair was making us all smile. Girls had their long hair pulled up neatly and stiffly high above their heads and tied by ribbons. We assumed it was an inordinately amount of hairspray or some such oddity that was keeping their Who hair in place.

We felt compelled to inquire as to how these mountains of hair were executed. So simple, the float leader said. Empty Coke bottles.

The Polar Express float won - but only by a hair.
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